I feel so overwhelmed… life is going to be gone so soon. Life as I know it. Church- gone. Church high school group- gone. Church Jr high ministry- gone. Church friends- gone. High School- gone. High school friends- gone. High School activities- gone. Home life- gone.
No, I’m not dying. I’m going to college. In a way, though, it is like a death and a rebirth. This is exciting. really! I get to start over. But at the same time, I’m having to say goodbye to alot of things. Alot.
This has been going through my head for a long time. You see, I’m losing my control on life.
I feel like Saul. Not, Saul/Paul, OT-Saul, the king who had it all and then lost it all.
I have ministries and chances to work in people’s lives- yet, I have to let them go. My hope is that a David will come by and pick up where I left off- leaders in NHS, StuCo, and SALT, hard workers in Yearbook and Drama, good senior role models, older brothers to younger guys, a worker in Jr High ministry, and other junk I don’t even realize I do.
I do very little- God just puts me in lots of places and works through me in many ways. But now, he’s proverbially pushing me forward and it seems like there’s an empty spot where I was standing… I feel like I need to find people to fill my spots- but do I? Do I need to find Davids? Can’t God call Davids to fill my empty Saul spots? I just need to let go… Maybe I’m a David coming into another ministry- I sure hope so.
This isn’t about me- this is all about others- sorry if I sound egotistical- I really just want ministry to continue. I want to make sure that people keep on growing and living- so I’m going to be a John the Baptist and trust that God has a greater man to fill my shoes.
Let that be me. A little arrow pointing to God.
let that be me